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  • Writer's pictureJim Hostler

One Door Closes, Another Opens

The saying, "One door closes and another opens" is true. But often endings/beginnings come with struggles, stress, anxiety, and breakdowns. Learning to navigate this transition dramatically alters how you end something and how your future shows up!

The door closing is a metaphor of an ending. Endings can happen as quiting or completion. The differences between the two are universes apart. Quitting and completions come in many varieties and forms. But they both have one thing in common... the end is now.

Quitting is most often quick and definitive. For example, "take this job and shove it", or "I Quit!". The spouse that walks out. The first 9 of your golf game, do you quit or is it a completion of the first 9? My car just quit working. I crossed the finish line of the marathon, therefore, I quit running the marathon. Quitting, again, quick and definitive... you don't even need to talk about it.

Completion, in comparison, can be a very insightful, purposeful, powerful, gives you commitment and direction, intention, velocity, focus, and leads to a transformational way to approach the ending of anything in your life.

Let's dive into completion and give you the learning to confidently complete anything, at any time, under any circumstances, in your life. Completion always lives in language. No communication, no completion! Completion ends anything, as I just shared, but whether anyone else is involved, or not, your completion is always with yourself first! You first, and always, apply this completion learning to yourself before you engage in a completion conversation with anyone else. Because (be-cause) it gives you the context and consciousness to come from in any completion conversation.

Where do you begin with completing something? You begin by STOPPING! Stopping to reflect is a very insightful and powerful practice to utilize. In the domain of reflection, take all the time you need to be with the situation at hand. Ask yourself questions such as...

  • what is the lesson here?

  • what serves me best?

  • what is complete and I am leaving it behind?

  • what are some "gold nuggets" I can learn from and take with me?

  • what are you grateful for?

  • how can or does this move me toward the fulfillment of my ambition(s)?

Take your time here and journal questions to yourself to really "go down this rabbit hole". It doesn't need to take a lot of time or energy and you will know - your inner wisdom - when you are complete with reflecting. The absolute power to reflection is the element of time. Don't think on it and never act, rather take moments over time to reflect. Said differently, leverage time to your advantage in reflection.

Having gathered your wisdom from what you are completing and knowing completion lives in language, now begin to choose the words for your completion. Begin with a conversation between your self (small self) and your Self - your Observer Self, your Higher Self. Consciously bring yourself into higher consciousness to have this conversation! After you are complete with your Self conversation, only now do you, if applicable, take your conversation into your outer world - to the other people involved in your completion conversation. If your completion involves someone else, can you add their perspective to your completion conversation? How extraordinary would it be to have a completion conversation with someone and your completion conversation centered on them!? That would be absolute mastery of a completion conversation!

The next fundamental element of a completion conversation is consciously choosing and maintaining your mood - whether you are by yourself, with another person or a team of people. This is an advanced communication skill few people even know about. Hit your "up" button on your mood elevator. Take yourself to your penthouse: ambitions. How is your completion conversation fulfilling one or more of your ambitions? Now you exist in a completely different energy than if you have a completion conversation in resentment, jealousy, despair, or anger. This is an extremely powerful domain for you to cultivate. Having a completion conversation in anger or having a completion conversation because it moves you closer to the fulfillment of one or more of your ambitions... see - feel - the difference?

The final area that too is mostly overlooked is somatics. Your body. To consciously be aware of your body in a completion conversation is critical. Are your shoulders rolled forward, are you slouching? Notice your breathing. If your slouching, your breath is shallow and in your upper chest. Roll your shoulders back, sit up, breath to your belly button, exude confidence... with humility. Feet flat on the floor. Hands, and arms not crossed. If you are at a table or desk, hands are comfortably on the table or desk. Somatics is an area we vastly operate from consciously unaware of what we are doing. To bring forth conscious awareness to our body and how it feels and the positions we take, and hold, is also another critical domain of completion.

Quitting remains always a choice. But if you don't process your emotions, the struggles, and hurts created because you quit something, too often those feelings are suppressed. And what is suppressed over time has to manifest in the physical. It's called dis-ease.

Learning the fundamentals of completion is transformative to and in your life. In the present, you consciously choose your language, mood, and bring awareness to your body. Now you are cause. Cause not only to the completion conversation but also cause to your future, that in the present, you are creating for yourself. Now you are cause in transforming your human experience.



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