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  • Writer's pictureJim Hostler

Overcoming Resentment

Resentment is a sneaky and disastrous emotion. It comes as a reaction of a perceived injustice or wrong doing of another to you. And some pretty nasty emotions often come on the heels of feeling resentment. Anger, bitterness, and even hatred towards the person or situation that we feel has wronged us can pop up frequently and out of nowhere.

Our egoic mind loves these low frequency emotions. Through them, it reaches out to find validation, justification, seeks agreement with others, and creates some really good stories to continue on this path. Letting the egoic mind sit in the driver's seat of life and holding onto resentment can be damaging to our mental and physical health (physical breakdowns!), as it leads to stress, anxiety, and even depression.

Through the O.M. Spiritual Center, I offer coaching to powerfully and effectively put your upset 2-year-old in the back seat to let it continue to throw it's tantrums there. Now, with you firmly in the driver's seat of your life, you take back control and direction of your life. With the awareness that resentment is a product of the egoic construct, coupled with the following knowledge of how to transform resentment, you are forever in the driver's seat of your life.

  1. Get really present to where resentment is coming from. The answer is that it is ALWAYS coming from your past. In holding onto resentment you are taking your past, putting in your future, and in the present living into your future given by stories, drama, negative emotions, and the perception of something that happen to you, in your past.

  2. This is almost a cliche, but in dealing with resentment, this is incredibly transformational, ask yourself, "Would I rather be right or be happy?". Give it up. Is the resentment issue worth hanging onto? Really? Is your emotional and physical well-being worth the internal conflict you are inflicting on yourself?

  3. What's the lesson? This reminds me of Ramana Maharshi's answer to the question, "How are we to treat others?" His response was, "There are no others." Can you see the other person or circumstance as a projection of an inner hurt in you being called to heal? Taking total responsibility for everything in your life causes some radical transformation to occur. Looking at the issue and asking "what is my lesson" is an extremely powerful place to come from. Find the lesson(s), treat it like you are mining for gold, because you are, your gold: your inner wisdom and Truth.

  4. Forgiveness. For-giving, is forgiveness. I promise you that you don't know the whole story of the other person and/or circumstance to the issue you think is causing your resentment. Forgive. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. For-giving, look for ways to be of service - giving. If your stuck in the smallness of resentment, honestly, and sorry if this is harsh, you need a bigger purpose in life. See this as an invitation to grow and be your Truth.

Resentment. Yes, it can be seductive as hell... as that is such an accurate metaphor. As giving into the emotion of resentment is taking yourself on a tour of low vibration emotions. And forget not, the Law of Attraction is always at work. Dive into anger, hate, or bitterness and you just asked for more of what you don't want. If fact, you just gave your power to that which you say you don't want. Yes, manage those lower emotions when they happen, look for the message and never, never, act when you are in entrapped in low emotions. With this awareness, you now have the knowing of being able to tap into your divine wisdom and transform resentment by transforming and transcending it.



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